Four Important Steps When Your Divorce Becomes Final

After an emotional journey, you get that manila envelope with your divorce decree signed by the judge. You are officially a single person once again. Whether you choose to celebrate or mourn, it’s important to stay focused-there are still some crucial steps you must take care of right away.

Review Your Divorce Decree – First, make sure you fully understand what’s in that envelope and what’s been awarded to you. There’s a good chance that you now need to have a QDRO (Qualified Domestic Relations Order) prepared to split a retirement plan, if your attorney didn’t address it in court. Don’t delay! Get that going now to ensure a timely split of the account.

Review all accounts – Be sure to remove your ex-spouse’s name from any existing accounts including utilities, banks, credit cards, etc. Change beneficiary on insurance policies and retirement accounts to reflect your wishes. If you don’t already have one, get a credit card in your name alone.  Now is the time to establish your own financial identity. Meet with a financial planner or wealth advisor to help you map out your new financial plan, open any new accounts necessary, and consolidate any old ones.

Organize Documents – Develop a filing system for your important financial documents as well as any statements that need to be retained for your records and tax purposes. If you’re tech savvy, this might be 100% electronic, but it needs to exist.

Review Estate Docs – This is the time when you want to be sure that your wishes are clear so there is no confusion. Have your will modified and recorded. If you had any trusts in place, you need to terminate them and create new ones. Have a new power of attorney drafted. Again, update all your beneficiaries on accounts and insurance policies immediately. I could tell you nightmare stories of ex spouse’s inheriting huge 401(k) plans because someone forgot to update the beneficiaries.

I remember how I felt when my final divorce decree arrived in the mail. Although it stirred up a lot of emotions, I knew deep down it was the right decision. I also realized I needed time to reflect, reset, and embrace my new reality to build a fresh start. Taking a week off work for a vacation gave me the space I needed to escape the noise and clear my mind. I asked God to carry me through that period of my life and to be my guiding light so that I could heal and find peace. Looking back now, I’m confident that my divorce had a positive impact on my life. It pushed me to forge new friendships and relationships, helping me grow into a healthier, more well-rounded, and happier version of myself. The logistical aspects weren’t exactly enjoyable, but with each step, I felt my new sense of independence and identity solidify-and that process was essential to my healing.

Time will heal all things! You just have to make the best of it while time passes. With each day, you will feel healthier and probably a little happier.

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